Tuesday, September 27, 2005

dis heart ted

I realised the other night that the person I want to be is close enough to spit on. It's weird but those little steps I need to take to get there just never get taken.... it's not that I don't think I could take them, it's not that i think it would be hard.... it's just that i don't.

Even now I can feel the joy and excitement of living surge through me. My life is good. Nothing changes but the joy and satisfaction I feel rolls around.

I worked as a bar tender at the Gallery on Friday night. I discovered that everyone wants to talk to the Bar Bitch. It was the most fun I've had in a while, the conversation flowed and I had something to occupy my mind and my hands.

That's it you can go back to whatever you were doing before you started to read this. I just wanted to tell someone.
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Thursday, September 22, 2005

10 things

I'm feeling good today. I've been thinking about my list of ten simple things that make me happy.

reading
sunshine
hammock
music
women
writing
the ocean
bike riding
beer
new things


I guess this means my ideal world is reading a new book while in a hammock on the beach on a sunny day. Good music would be playng in the back ground while being served beer by women. That sounds about right...oh I would be riding home when the sun goes down.
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Wednesday, September 21, 2005

things are becoming clearer

The majority of my ideal jobs involve reading and writting. It makes me wonder why I manage an IT team for a living. Everyone says that you should do what you love.

Reading and writing are the things I love so I should really be looking into that arena for full time work.

I doubt my skills but if I don't give it a go I'll never know (hey I'm a poet).
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Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Morning

I just banged out that last blog entry without checking it. This morning I re-read it.... there are a few mistakes but I'm gonna let them stand. The universe feels good this morning. Nothing has changed but how I'm looking at the world. The weekend was great, I'm feeling bonded to my wife and everything is unfolding as it should. Hopefully this feeling will keep going a bit longer.

Monday, September 19, 2005

100 words (but who is counting)

So now I've started to write again. It's amazing how much I look forward to banging out any old crap yet when it comes time to sit down and actually do it I just don't know where to start. So I've started at the point where I have nothing to say. Just type, don't think. It's like the 100 words a day website. Every day you are suppose to bang out a hundred words of crap to get your juices flowing and the brain in gear. No topless pictures this post.... I'm feeling at peace with the world, my desires have subsided.

There was no reason she should have left, no reason that he could think of. She was gone though, there was no doubting that. She had even left a postcard to remind him that she was gone. It said that she was leaving the country, didn't know when she was coming back and even if she did it was doubtful that she would be returning to him. He was thinking that this was a little weird. Just a few dys agao everything was good and now there was a gap where his wife use to be. When he first found the postcard he was angry. Soon anger gave way to hunger and he had some toast. This was going to take a bit of getting use to.
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Wednesday, September 14, 2005

A shot from my birthday


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more of the same



My blog has been a forum to discuss my issues with goals and planning. For the most part I've stayed away from talking about my inner self and have focus on my outerself. This entry isn't going to be any different. I felt great while following the goals I set for my self but I got bored. Doing all the right things made me feel good physically but left me a bit empty mentally. I'm turning back towards the health kick (groans from everyone who knows me) but I know I'm just going to get bored again. I really need to find a way to make life seem interesting and worth while without having to indulge every passing whim (not every one, some of my whims would be detrimental to my life). It seems to be a samll thing to go to the gym, eat well and not smoke but every time I try I get increasingly frustrated with my inability to stick to the plan.

Dream Job #8 Magazine editor (black and white preferably)


Why?

You get to read interesting article submissions all day. I could ask people to write about the things that I'm interested in. I would have a magazine to read in which all the articles would be the ones I wanted. Every day you get to immerse yourself in interesting topics and information. Your job is to keep your finger on the pulse and have interesting things to say.

If the magazine was black and white I could also get paid to look at arty nudes. There are worse ways to earn a living. Are we detecting any reoccuring themes yet?
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Tuesday, September 13, 2005

I'm back


After two weeks sailing the seas of indulgence I have returned to blog. My journey took me far away from any of the goals I have set myself. I visited the land of sloth and the land of much smoking.

There have been some high points while I have been non blogging. Over the past two weeks I have found myself at a number of gallery openings drinking free/cheap beer and feeling very arty in general. I've come to the conclusion that it is more important to feel arty than to actually be arty (although being good at art would be fantastic).

The fundamnetal questions of life have been nipping at my heels again. I've started to wonder if I'm too obsessed with having a goal or something meaningful to do. Who said I needed to be doing constuctive things with my life and what does constructive actually mean? I'm planning to lighten up on myself a bit. I'll try to do the right things... gym, not smoking and the like but still have fun when fun is to be had. In honour of this new found freedom I'm going to post a picture of a naked girl because I love naked girls!
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Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Typo city

I just re-read my last entry. Type fast, spell bad

quick update



My spare time at home has been taken up with evily addictive Sid Myers Pirates on the xbox (curse you xbox).

I've sat down to blog twice in the last few days.Each time I delete the entry without posting. Third time is a charm.

Staying Alive was a great musical. I'm not a musical kind of guy but the Bee Gees get my hips moving.

I got to go for another dive on the weekend. No grey nurse sharks this time unfortunately but we did get to see a whale do a full breech. They sound amazing under water. I've never heard whales in the ocean before. Once again I went through my air realy quickly - 200 bar gone in 35 minutes. I'm blaming the smokes I had that morning. (yes the weekend was a complete breakdown of the non-smoking regime).

I have been given some new gifts for the Tiki lounge from Roodgy. A cool stone carving of a woman... her name is Whilma (not sure how to spell it). Roodgy and Detta are great... they would have to be the friendliest people I have met in ages...... Detta has her own blog at http://aitcho.blogspot.com/ With any luck there will be some new photos going up here soon.

The photo is from a burlesque game show called this or that... now that is entertainment (shame we don't get i here ;-()


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Thursday, September 01, 2005

update

Just got cable at home - more posts more regularly ;-)
Just saw Saturday night fever stage show - something to talk about ;-)
off to Byron bay for a few days - something to talk aobut later

....No time to talk now

Monday, August 29, 2005

are you a secret blogger?

I’m looking for any comments on the idea of having a secret blogging identity. Should your blogself be a secret? I started out with a vision of not telling anyone, so I could blog all my secrets away. Once I started I ended up telling people about it and now most of my friends know where it is. I didn’t blog any secrets when the blog was a secret so why should it change now? I do pay more attention to what I post so people I know don’t get the wrong idea. Really I am editing what is going up on the blog. As it is in life so it is in blog.
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Spam content blocker, check

Let see the spammers get into my commetns now....... of course this means no comments for me but I would rather no comments than spam comments

auto comments

I hate the auto commenting from companies selling things.... you put up a post and then you get a "hi love your blog check out my cheap japanese auto spares website at ....." Admittedly I would have few comments without them but it still shits me.

more rip offs from other people

http://www.tonypierce.com/blog/2004/06/how-to-blog-by-tony-pierce-110-1.htm

how to blog
by tony pierce, 110

1. write every day.

2. if you think youre a good writer, write twice a day.

3. dont be afraid to do anything. infact if youre afraid of something, do it. then do it again. and again.

4. cuss like a sailor.

5. dont tell your mom, your work, your friends, the people you want to date, or the people you want to work for about your blog. if they find out and you'd rather they didnt read it, ask them nicely to grant you your privacy.

6. have comments. dont be upset if no one writes in your comments for a long time. eventually they'll write in there. if people start acting mean in your comments, ask them to stop, they probably will.

7. have an email address clearly displayed on your blog. sometimes people want to tell you that you rock in private.

8. dont worry very much about the design of your blog. image is a fakeout.

9. use Blogger. it's easy, it's free; and because they are owned by Google, your blog will get spidered better, you will show up in more search results, and more people will end up at your blog. besides, all the other blogging software & alternatives pretty much suck.

10. use spellcheck unless youre completely totally keeping it real. but even then you might want to use it if you think you wrote something really good.

11. say exactly what you want to say no matter what it looks like on the screen. then say something else. then keep going. and when youre done, re-read it, and edit it and hit publish and forget about it.

12. link like crazy. link anyone who links you, link your favorites, link your friends. dont be a prude. linking is what seperates bloggers from apes. and especially link if you're trying to prove a point and someone else said it first. it lends credibility even if youre full of shit.

13. if you havent written about sex, religion, and politics in a week youre probably playing it too safe, which means you probably fucked up on #5, in which case start a second blog and keep your big mouth shut about it this time.

14. remember: nobody cares which N*Sync member you are, what State you are, which Party of Five kid you are, or which Weezer song you are. the second you put one of those things on your blog you need to delete your blog and try out for the marching band. similarilly, nobody gives a shit what the weather is like in your town, nobody wants you to change their cursor into a butterfly, nobody wants to vote on whether your blog is hot or not, and nobody gives a rat ass what song youre listening to. write something Real for you, about you, every day.

15. dont be afraid if you think something has been said before. it has. and better. big whoop. say it anyway using your own words as honestly as you can. just let it out.

16. get Site Meter and make it available for everyone to see. if you're embarrassed that not a lot of people are clicking over to your page, dont be embarrassed by the number, be embarrassed that you actually give a crap about hits to your gay blog. it really is just a blog. and hits really dont mean anything. you want Site Meter, though, to see who is linking you so you can thank them and so you can link them back. similarilly, use Technorati, but dont obsess. write.

17. people like pictures. use them. save them to your own server. or use Blogger's free service. if you dont know how to do it, learn. also get a Buzznet account. several things will happen once you start blogging, one of them is you will learn new things. thats a good thing.

18. before you hit Save as Draft or Publish Post, select all and copy your masterpiece. you are using a computer and the internet, shit can happen. no need to lose a good post.

19. push the envelope in what youre writing about and how youre saying it. be more and more honest. get to the root of things. start at the root of things and get deeper. dig. think out loud. keep typing. keep going. eventually you'll find a little treasure chest. every time you blog this can happen if you let it.

20. change your style. mimic people. write beautiful lies. dream in public. kiss and tell. finger and tell. cry scream fight sing fuck and dont be afraid to be funny. the easiest thing to do is whine when you write. dont be lazy. audblog at least once a week.

21. write open letters. make lists. call people out on their bullshit. lead by example. invent and reinvent yourself. start by writing about what happened to you today. for example today i told a hot girl how wonderfully hot she is.

22. when in doubt review something. theres not enough reviews on blogs. review a movie you just saw, a tv show, a cd, a kiss you just got, a restaurant, a hike you just took, anything.

23. constantly write about the town that you live in.

24. out yourself. tell your secrets. you can always delete them later.

25. dont use your real name. dont write about your work unless you dont care about getting fired.

26. dont be afraid to come across as an asswipe. own your asswipeness.

27. nobody likes poems. dont put your poems on your blog. not even if theyre incredible. especially if theyre incredible. odds are theyre not incredible. bad poems are funny sometimes though, so fine, put your dumb poems on there. whatever.

28. tell us about your friends.

29. dont apologize about not blogging. nobody cares. just start blogging again.

30. read tons of blogs and leave nice comments.

if you're going to ripoff/mimic/be inspired by one blogger make it raymi, shes perfect.

scatalogical build up

shit shit shit fuck fuck fuck.... that's better. scatalogical build up. It's a good way to clear the mind

The good and bad blend to make a normal human. You look at me and see a saint, the girl that catches me looking at her tits thinks I'm sinner. I'm not really either, I oscilate betweeen all poles, never going too far in any direction.

Sometimes it's "Fuck it all give me naked women, drugs, booze and smokes... pleasure to stop the brain" then it's "meditation, gym and clean living". For the record I had smokes on Sunday... loved 'em now I have to give em up again.

I read a great little blog on how to blog... point number 4 was to note let anyone who knows you know where your blog is so you can blog without fear of retribution..... I stuffed that one up.

Friday, August 26, 2005

warning *boring post*

Abyss of darkness descended over me last night... existential anxiety brought on by no smokes and the end of ‘Lost’. I made the crucial mistake of not doing anything after getting home from work, no meditation and no gym. TV and bourbon were consumed without thought.

At least the weekend is almost here and I can relax a bit. There are no plans but I’m sure something will eventuate.

I can feel the urge to cut lose and get stupid coming on……

What I need are some tips on making life a bit more exciting. I'm seeing a pattern here. My blog is becoming a whinge fest... screw it that's how I'm feeling right this second.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Quote for the day

"A ship in port is safe, but that is not what ships are built for. Sail out to sea and do new things."

-- Rear Admiral Dr. Grace Murray Hopper

Evil brain defeated

Even though evil brain was trying had to get me to smoke the weekend remained smoke free…. even with alcohol and smokers every where